Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
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