he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
he told me I talked like a deaf person
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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