It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
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