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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
No stitches, just platelets and will power
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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