when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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