My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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