would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
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we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
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She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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