It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
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