took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
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if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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