I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
It's like God shit irony all over that family
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Randomize