I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize