the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize