how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Randomize