Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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