It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
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