Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (231): View more from Michigan

  I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?

  (810): View more from Michigan

  humiliate her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (231): I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do? (810): humiliate her http://tfl.nu/wc6r
  Replies (1) Good night (1652) Bad night (498)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (603): I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed. http://tfl.nu/bqzz
  Replies (26) Good night (534) Bad night (4349) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (206): Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick. http://tfl.nu/0596
  Replies (43) Good night (1101) Bad night (2763) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (518): View more from New York

  After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (518): After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you" http://tfl.nu/k4ce
  Replies (42) Good night (1240) Bad night (6600)
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  Sober January is a disaster.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): Sober January is a disaster. http://tfl.nu/b9eq
  Replies (6) Good night (1294) Bad night (3160) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (703): View more from Virginia

  She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (703): She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all. http://tfl.nu/qt2o
  Replies (13) Good night (4962) Bad night (890) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (510): View more from California

  i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (510): i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter. http://tfl.nu/xztf
  Replies (33) Good night (1890) Bad night (5436) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no. http://tfl.nu/new9
  Replies (23) Good night (1405) Bad night (3753) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom. http://tfl.nu/iz3f
  Replies (23) Good night (871) Bad night (4539) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (334): View more from Alabama

  I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.

  (1-334): View more from Alabama

  Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (334): I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does. (1-334): Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers. http://tfl.nu/3563
  Replies (21) Good night (4520) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night http://tfl.nu/cuhc
  Replies (2) Good night (1189) Bad night (302) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3

  (906): View more from Michigan

  Omg sara

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3 (906): Omg sara (920): I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty http://tfl.nu/fytc
  Replies (8) Good night (1462) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (614): I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day http://tfl.nu/6l93
  Replies (5) Good night (2005) Bad night (538) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (479): Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom. http://tfl.nu/7rpj
  Replies (7) Good night (2768) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out

  (417): View more from Missouri

  You'd think the first few times would have been enough

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out (417): You'd think the first few times would have been enough http://tfl.nu/z7d7
  Replies (10) Good night (452) Bad night (1303)

Randomize