Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.

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  (203): I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you. http://tfl.nu/ig1m
  Replies (8) Good night (1392) Bad night (589) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.

  (858): View more from California

  i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents

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  (858): Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions. (858): i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents http://tfl.nu/ut40
  Replies (19) Good night (599) Bad night (2314)
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  (315): View more from New York

  You smell like a Billy Joel song

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  (315): You smell like a Billy Joel song http://tfl.nu/8lk7
  Replies (7) Good night (736) Bad night (1929) Order T-Shirt
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  (316): View more from Kansas

  Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.

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  (316): Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can. http://tfl.nu/zubg
  Replies (26) Good night (1097) Bad night (3898) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween

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  (845): beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween http://tfl.nu/oes5
  Replies (26) Good night (5704) Bad night (411) Order T-Shirt
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  (931): View more from Tennessee

  dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.

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  (931): dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud. http://tfl.nu/azxi
  Replies (20) Good night (5497) Bad night (455) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee

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  (314): Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee http://tfl.nu/57zq
  Replies (20) Good night (8386) Bad night (949) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.

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  (781): i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed. http://tfl.nu/tv17
  Replies (9) Good night (4944) Bad night (983) Order T-Shirt
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  (845): View more from New York

  i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.

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  (845): i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now. http://tfl.nu/ygdu
  Replies (12) Good night (926) Bad night (3249) Order T-Shirt
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools

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  (301): Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools http://tfl.nu/2rog
  Replies (2) Good night (3151) Bad night (653) Order T-Shirt
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.

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  (402): In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes. http://tfl.nu/rvi7
  Replies (11) Good night (980) Bad night (4030) Order T-Shirt
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".

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  (905): I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn". http://tfl.nu/2c8a
  Replies (6) Good night (2102) Bad night (521) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.

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  (901): He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy. http://tfl.nu/2710
  Replies (6) Good night (1634) Bad night (551) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having

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  (505): I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having http://tfl.nu/8kbk
  Replies (1) Good night (952) Bad night (318) Order T-Shirt
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  (702): View more from Nevada

  She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...

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  (702): She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her... http://tfl.nu/8w76
  Replies (6) Good night (413) Bad night (863)

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