First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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