She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
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It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
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Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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