wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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