Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize