I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
So apparently the bar gave out free condoms, which I now have a pocket full of. Why is drunk me shoving the fact that I'm single and not getting laid in sober me's face...
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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