Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
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