How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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