ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
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like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
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One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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