Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize