soooo we both peed the bed last night...
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize