Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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