I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize