It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize