um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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