Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
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