Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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