Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
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