I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
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