saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
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Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
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All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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