Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
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