Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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