Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
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It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
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I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize