Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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