Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize