how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
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He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
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man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
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