I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize