I must be too annoying 4 u.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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