i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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