So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize