hotel room ftw
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
2020 sucks, I want a refund
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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