there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize