The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize