"it" just moved
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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